Lessons from Tumbling Class

Today, I took Mia to our first tumbling class. There were about 15 other children there, mostly between the ages of 15 and 20 months, along with their respective caregivers. It was fabulous, wonderful, active chaos.

One of the benefits to this is an opportunity for Mia to practice social skills such as sharing, waiting her turn, and basic consideration of others. I want her to have the opportunity to interact with children of different ages, and lifestyles, and backgrounds, and to learn how to "play nice" with all of them.

And today, she did. That doesn't mean there weren't moments where she snatched the ball away from another child, or demanded that another child vacate the climbing toy she wanted to play on. But when that happened, she was warned/reprimanded, and guided on to something else. She's a toddler. She has definitive wants and a limited view on the world. If it's in her sight, it belongs to her. It takes some guidance from the adults in her life for her to learn that others have wants also, and to respect those playing around her.

Wouldn't it be fabulous if others could remember these lessons from toddlerhood? A few lessons my toddler is learning that could apply to this "Christian leader" and his followers:

• The individual is not the group. During play groups, there have been times where Mia has been knocked down by a particularly strong-willed child. In one situation, it is often the same little boy, and over time, I have seen her learn her lesson and start to maintain a distance from this child. However, it is only this child that she avoids. Not all boys (not even close, heaven help us), not all children of the same race, not all children of the same age. Just the one child. The one that causes her "pain" (as much as her little padded behind is "pained".



• Causing reciprocal pain is not an option. While a child takes Mia's toy, or pushes her out of the way, there are a number of ways she can remedy the situation. She can ask for help (enter Mommy or Daddy to save the day/toy). She can let it go, and find something else to occupy her attention. As she gets older, she can offer a compromise, such as trading for another toy. What she can't do is fight nastiness with nastiness. No hitting, shoving, or stealing back. Don't we all teach our kids these resolution skills?



• There is nobody else exactly like you. And for that, let's all pause a moment and say, "Amen" because really? One Mia at a time is enough, thankyouverymuch. Even among the children at our tumbling class today, there was a wide variety. In addition to various races/ethnic groups, it was obvious that there were several social classes and parenting styles present. All these factors together mean that each individual child is growing up in a uniquely different environment. But you know what? They were all happy as could be to play with each other on the trampoline, and tumbling mats, and slides. They laughed and sang together. It wasn't Kumbaya-ish, but it was a great time.

I'm not so naive as to think that the lessons applied in my toddler's tumbling class be easily transferred to world affairs. But in the last couple weeks I've had several run-ins with individuals who have expressed a very strong dislike for a particular group. Not unique individuals, but an entire group. And this worries me, as this hatred will inevitably be passed along to the youth.

And that's a shame, because in 30 years? I want my toddler to have the opportunity to teach her own child lessons from tumbling class.