Today, I took Mia to pick up the professional photos that we had done last week. The studio is in the lower level of a shopping center, along a fairly narrow hallway. Knowing that, and knowing that I'd only be running in and running out, and knowing that Mia hates to be taken in and out of the carseat, I decided to just take the carrier in. As I rounded the corner, in front of me is a woman looking in the window of the bookstore across from the portrait studio. Her back is turned to me and to her 2-year-old son, who is literally bouncing off the walls on either side of the hallway.
I wasn't sure how to get around the toddler without running in to him, so I stopped.
The woman didn't turn around.
Her son, however, spun around suddenly and ran smack into Mia's carrier, conking himself on the head, and falling down onto his well-padded bottom at my feet.
The woman didn't turn around.
Her son paused, not seriously hurt, but definitely surprised. This curly-haired, dark-eyed cutie looked at me in shock to find himself suddenly on the floor. He opened his mouth and let out a perfect toddler wail.
Now the mother turns around. But she doesn't reach for him. She takes the time to send me the nastiest look.
Wait, what? I was standing still when her toddler, whom she had her back to, had run into me. I still apologized immediately and asked if he was okay. She ignored me.
Now, my instinct is to reach down and help the poor little guy up from the floor, but a look like that sends the signal that my touching her child, even to help him up while she stared me down and he cried, wouldn't be the right move. We stood there awkwardly for a good 10 seconds before she reached down, pulled him up by one hand, and told him to "watch where he was going." I asked again if he was okay, she ignored me a second time. I apologized again. Finally, I stepped away when the father came around the corner.
I'm new at this whole parenting thing, but isn't there a Mommy-quette thing here? Because if the situation had been reversed (first of all, I'd like to think that I wouldn't have my back turned on my toddler while she ran up and down the hallway, but that aside...), I would have picked Mia up, given her a hug and kiss, told her that she was fine, and then immediately let the other mother know that no harm was done. I was holding my 15 lb baby in a heavy plastic carrier. It's not like I could have been swinging her around. Doesn't common sense let you know what had likely happened? And that poor cutie...when it was obvious mom wasn't going to help him up and kiss it better, I wanted to do it myself.
This has bothered me all day. In the grand scheme of things, it's an insignificant event. Nobody was hurt. I won't ever see the woman again. But geez, that look.
And now I've let it out.
And now I will let it go.
Because in half an hour, it's time for the under-1 crowd to go to bed. And for me to settle in with my Jennifer Weiner.
Which is a much better way to end a Saturday.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
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3 comments:
I would have handled the same way as you.
I would have handled it just like you did. In my opinion it was very rude of her not to acknowledge your concern and irresponsible of her to have her back turned on her toddler - I couldn't image where my 15 m/o would run to if I turned my back on him for even a second!
Unfortunately not everyone chooses to parent the way we choose to parent. There are people out there who view their child has an inconvenience. Not saying that this woman was like that, but I know those parents are out there.
That said, you can only control your reaction and you did the right thing. I am constantly aware of what my toddler is doing and there is NO WAY I would allow her to not be physically attached to me in a public place. At church, I give here a little more leeway, just because she knows the place and the people. But in a mall? Never.
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